Monday, June 4, 2012

An Open Letter...to my GPS


Dear GPS, 

Where do I begin? I can honestly say, I'd be lost without you. You, with your helpful blue dot and options of routes - you help me navigate to work, to restaurants, to parks - we do everything together! Whether I'm walking, driving, or taking public transit - you know it all. 

In that moment when I emerge from the metro underground, arriving at the top of the too-steep-for-comfort escalator, squinting as the sun shines in my eyes and people bustle about around me, you are there for me. Your blue dot - after a few blocks, mind you - lets me know that I've gone the wrong direction and should turn around. I like to think the delay is for my own good. You have faith that I will figure it out on my own - you give me that opportunity. Like a good friend, you give me more credit than I deserve. However, you quickly realize when I need your help because I don't always catch on that N Street should be after L Street. You don't judge me. You just turn me around. God bless you, GPS. 

We even joke around, like best buddies. Like, when you steer me into a tunnel and then say, "Signal lost. Find signal. Signal lost." Oh, you jokester. YOU are the one who lost the damn signal. I wasn't trying to be in this tunnel!

GPS app, you may have cost $20/year, but to me, you're priceless. Since the day I first laid eyes on you, we were close. However, over the last few weeks, as I've discovered my new city, you've become incredibly important to me - my electronic family. GPS, I remember that time last weekend when I thought I'd lost you. It was a terrifying few minutes. You were rerouting me to a detour of a detour of a detour due to road closures for Memorial Day. I didn't know where I was and put all my faith in your navigating abilities. 

And then, you died. 

I remember thinking "NO! GPS, said it ain't so. Your last words to me cannot be 'In .5 miles, turn right on......TEMPERATURE FAILURE.'" Apparently you got overheated? Whaaaat?  

I remember praying, "Dear gadget God, I promise, if GPS just pulls through - preferably before the light turns green - then I'll never put her in a sunny spot again. I'll never swear at her or exclaim, 'Re-route THIS DAMNIT!.' Please, just bring her back."

I held you in front of the air conditioner, I hid you in the shade of my seat. And, then, miraculously, you pulled through. Just in time to tell me I missed my turn. Don't ever do that again, GPS. 

No seriously, don't. 

GPS, we have many long adventures ahead us as we discover this city together. (Although, hopefully the adventures won't be too long because, well, you claim to save me time with your superb navigation skills and direct routes. I mean, you put that out there. I'm just saying.)

Thanks for helping me find my way to Whole Foods. I appreciate your directions to and from my sister's house. I guess what I'm trying to say is, wherever you lead, I will follow. Mostly because, I have no choice. 

Your friend, 
Lindsay

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