Wednesday, June 28, 2017

Things I've learned about puppyhood

Jordan and I have been woken up every two hours for the last four nights by our five-month-old puppy, Norman. I won't go into the details but let's just call it a "bowel situation."

Every two hours.

For four straight nights.

The fact that Jordan and I are both slightly dying more and more with every 3AM outing does not bode well for any children in our future.

Every two hours.

For four straight nights.

(At this point, will the moms please spare me the "girl, you have no idea!" comments. Puppies are not the same as babies. I know this. But I'm still tired. Just let me have this one, please.)

Really, the fault is ours. Let this be a warning: Don't ever go on vacation without your dog. He will know. He will know and you will pay.

I suppose we should be honored that Norman loves us so much. The feeling is mutual, after all. In my unbiased opinion, he's the very best, most adorable, sweetest, kindest puppy that there ever was.

But, MAN, can he hold a grudge.

Monday, June 26, 2017

An open letter to Bumble and The Hallmark Channel

To Whom It May Concern at Bumble and The Hallmark Channel:

You may already be aware of this fact: Weddings are expensive. Like, really expensive. We want a simple-yet-classy wedding but I've also always wanted to invite all my loved ones, which is quite a few (#blessed). So, even though we're pretty laid back about the aesthetic and vision of our wedding, it adds up.

That's where you come in. I am presenting you with a unique opportunity to put a price on love.

I am inviting you to sponsor our wedding. Here's why:

Bumble,

You're the reason for the season. We met because of you!

We're your classic, modern day love story:

  • Girl sees boy on Bumble. Girl swipes right for boy. Boy sees girl on Bumble. Boy swipes right for girl. Bzzzz...it's a match!
  • Thanks to Bumble, girl has all the power and comes up with some pithy, intriguing line like "Hi." (I'm not actually sure how our convo started but clearly I #nailedit).  
  • Boy and girl meet for drinks so that they have an easy out if things get boring/weird/etc. 
  • Boy seems nice. Boy makes girl laugh. Girl is intrigued. 
  • Next day, boy and girl text and immediately set up second date for later that week. 
  • Eleven months later, ENGAGED.
  • Boy and girl live "APPily" every after. (SEE WHAT I DID THERE?)

Of all the (often tedious and exhausting) dating apps out there, you finally came through for us, Bumble. Like a breath of fresh air. He flew into my life. The buzz of our wedding is all because of you! (See, I have so many bee puns you could use!)

I'm back...again. This time with a fiance & a puppy.

Me again.

I'm still here. Boy, have I had a year. (This is not going to be a poem. That was a coincidence).

I finished grad school, got a new job, and, as you probably know because you likely clicked through to this blog from my social media and/or you're my mom, I'm getting married in December.

And my fiance, Jordan, and I got a puppy.



And we moved across the river to Alexandria, Virginia where we're renting a town home and do things like trim hedges and hire gutter cleaners.

See, do I win for life updates or what?

I keep getting asked (hi mom) about the blog and if it's coming back, so I've been thinking about it. I mull it over. Then, I get distracted by things like drinking wine on the deck and I stop thinking about it. But now I'm on a wedding diet and I don't have as many happy hours and so I'm thinking about it again.