Wednesday, December 5, 2012

This Post Is About A Grocery Store.

(I thought I'd spell that out to begin with in case there is something more exciting you want to do with your time. This post is solely 100% about grocery shopping. If you're into that kind of thing (and, let's be honest, who isnt?) then read on...)

When I moved to DC, I lost touch with someone I'd grown quite close to in Charlotte. 

Joe. Trader Joe.

To me, Trader Joe's is like the Target of grocery stores. You go in there for one thing and the next thing you know, you're basket is full and you've convinced yourself that you absolutely need veggie tortilla chips and coconut water popsicles. Clearly.

In Charlotte, there was a Trader Joe's five minutes from my house. In DC, it's not so convenient. Well, ok, it's like a 10 minute drive but I've now become conditioned to think anything that isn't walkable, or is farther than 1 metro stop away, is inconvenient. So, even though I've been here eight months (whaaaat?!), I still hadn't made the trip. 

Last week, a girl in the elevator was carrying Trader Joe's bags and I had been thinking about my long-lost friend ever since (Trader Joe's, not the girl. I don't even know that girl. That would be weird.) Any Trader Joe's shopper knows that the best time to visit Ol' Joe is during the holiday season. No one does affordable holiday fare like Trader Joe's.
Not pictured: gingerbread mix. Because I forgot and feel lame re-doing pictures of groceries. You get the point. 
Produce, now that's another story. Sorry, Joe, but your produce sucks. You know it's true. But, Joe, I don't love you because of your produce. I'm seeing Whole Foods and farmers' markets on the side for that. And, I don't love you for your everyday grocery or household items. My friend Harris Teeter fulfills those needs. Trader Joe's, you're in my life for four main reasons: Candy Cane Joe Joe cookies, delicious frozen snacks, cheese and cheap wine.

Now, about that last one. This is the proper time to inform you of one major, super duper uber flaw to my most recent Trader Joe's experience. Let me spell it out for you:
- One of nearest Trader Joe's locations is Bethesda.
- Bethesda is in Maryland.
- Maryland won't sell wine in grocery stores.
- There is no cheap wine at that Trader Joe's. There is no 2-buck Chuck. There is no wine section at all.

You're killin' me, Maryland. What is that?

I know, it's horrible. I had to try my cheese sample with nothing to wash it down but my own metaphorical tears of nostalgia for a $3.00 pinot noir. Tough life, huh?

Despite my lack of cheap alcohol, I still managed to walk out of there with three grocery bags full of deliciousness, including the previously pictured Candy Cane Joe Joes and Candy Cane green tea. Basically, my apartment smells like peppermint day and night. And. It's. Glorious. 

Trader Joe, welcome back to my life. It's been too long. How 'bout next time, I go to the DC location and we toast our freshly rediscovered relationship with a cheaper-than-a-bottle-of-water-at-a-Panthers-game Cabernet?   

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